GOALS

I’ve come to the conclusion that I have weird goals and aspirations. I came to this realization upon accomplishing one of my goals earlier today. I’m a white male, around 5’7”, with brown hair, and brown eyes. Close enough to the Arian to avoid racial discrimination. I have longer hair for a male, about shoulder length, that waves and curls uncontrollably. Instead of setting goals in life like normal people I have set goals for my hair. Normal people will set their goals at things like; becoming an astronaut, learning to speak another ridiculous language, eat as many hotdogs as possible in an hour, bowl a perfect game, eliminate all minorities, lose weight, consume as many phallic foods in front of children and clergy men… the list goes on and on. But I digress. My goals are quite different. One that I have achieved today was being able to comfortably get my hair into my mouth. I’ve wanted long hair for quite some time now and as I set off on this magnificent journey I decided that my mouth would be an appropriate length to be happy with. Today I was able to fit my bangs entirely into my face hole. This is a quite the achievement for me. I feel strongly that people should set high goals for themselves, as it will propel them to greatness, and being able to achieve one of my goals, at such a young age, fills me with the amazing feeling of accomplishment. There is a tingly warming sensation within my tummy. But upon research, done on my personal time, I’ve learned that this could be one of the warning signs of ulcers. But once again I digress. Since now I have achieved my goal I’ve decided it’s time for me to create another goal for myself and not simply settle with my current level of success. My new goal is also for my hair. I’ve decided that I want my hair to get quite longer. My next goal is to grow my hair so that it looks like a lamp shade. It will take a while for my hair to get to that length all the way around. But as I stated before, one should set their goals high, and in no way shape or form am I an exception. So once again I find myself in this position. About to embark on a great journey towards success. Let’s do this my friends. Let’s do this.